Gordon in the morning: Just about managing

It's hard to believe, but it seems that Gordon Smart is still spending every waking hour hanging out backstage at the Spice Girls gigs. And it's paying off.

Admittedly, it's only paying off for the other writers on the Sun, who are getting to file the more eyecatching stories - like Michael Jackson's post-it note face - while Smart is churning out Spice non-stories like today's 'Victoria Beckham approves of the new England manager'.

Beckham's vague "I think it’s great that Capello is the new England manager" sends Smart reeling off on a long piece about Fabio Capello, his supporters and his habits, for all the world as if he's the Prime Minister of Football rather than writing about Showbusiness. So we're treated to, erm, Gordon Brown's view of Capello (every bit as vague as Posh Spice's) before a long riff inspired by Capello's brief mentioning of Fawlty Towers. From this, Smart surmises that he must be "learning English" by watching reruns of the sitcom, which doesn't make sense - surely he'd be better off with Jossy's Giants? - and has precious little to do with showbiz.

We've not checked the sports pages yet, but we're fairly certain they're not writing about Girls Aloud.