Ah, yes. There's no pubs in the suburbs

We really hope that the story in this morning's Bizarre is just a spot of space-filling speculation and that Amy Winehouse's dad and manager don't think that the way to deal with someone who has serious addiction problems is to get them to "move out of Camden" and to "have a word with landlords in Camden":

"Ray has been to see the landlords of pubs in Camden to ask them to help keep Amy in check.

“He wants them to look out for hangers-on who might lead her into trouble."

Ah, yes. Because up to now, the people who run Camden's pubs would have been unaware that Amy was in trouble.

More to the point, what are they supposed to do? "I'm not serving you, you've got a hanger-on with you. You'll have to go outside if you want an acolyte..."

And if the landlords of Camden could somehow control Winehouse's drinking, then why would you take the trouble to move her away to another part of town where her manager hasn't had a word?

Still, having seen Newton's interview style on last night's Britain's Next Top Model, we're starting to see how this sort of thing might appear in the papers. The would-be models were put through a "task" where they were grilled by Newton on supposed scandals they'd been involved in; "I'm Victoria Newton from The Sun" sat asking them weak questions, wearing enormous sunglasses (I do apologise if Victoria had recently had a cataract operation before she'd filmed the segment.) How can you interview someone properly on a sex or drug scandal if you're unable to make eye contact with them? The whole piece was a bit stilted - the programmes quickly moved on to a bit with Joan Rivers and Max Clifford instead - but did include the comedy gold of Newton, in all seriousness, suggesting that showing your breasts might undermine your modelling career.